a valentine miracle

I apologize if I made your head itchy this week. And I'm sorry I'm such a gigantic baby. I am fully aware that there are many many worse things to be inflicted with than lice. And, it seems really silly to have been SO WORKED UP when we didn't even get lice. Thank you, Jesus. THANK YOU, JESUS!

Lice is just one {of many} of my fears. I would rather have mice than lice. I would rather have bats then lice. I would rather have birds than lice. And that is saying something. ...although, birds would probably give us lice, or WORSE(!) scabies. I think I'm going to hyperventilate.

Deep breaths.

Deep breaths.

I'm totally aware that my reaction to this possible lice threat was way over the top. But, it was a learning experience. In my own pathetic way, it made me lean HEAVY on my Lord. I've been struggling lately with giving everything to Him. Feeling like there are certain areas that I'm happy to relinquish, and others that I like to control. Fearing that if I completely fling myself into God's hands, He'll give me cancer. Or give my kids cancer. Or something horrible. Which is stupid. Seriously. This is embarrassing to admit, but it's true.

Why would I fear? It's not like I can control anything anyway. Why do I keep trying?

Anyway, through this pathetic ordeal, I couldn't help but feel like giving up control would mean getting lice.

I would hop in my car, and the radio would only play songs that spoke about how I wasn't in this life alone. Pandora was giving me songs about the same thing. I am not alone. My God is enough. He is my strength.

Scripture would come to mind:
"I can do all things through Him who gives me strength."

"My yoke is easy and my burden is light."

.....and I was reminded that God DOES give us more than we can handle. So that we don't try to handle it all. Because He never said it would be easy. He only said we'd never be alone.

So the theme for the last week of my life was: my patheticness and God's amazingness.

Can you believe He loves me anyway?

Now THAT is a miracle.