I don't allow my kids to call people dumb or stupid. But, then, I don't allow my kids call people other mean names, either.
I allow them to call things dumb and stupid. Because sometimes things are dumb and stupid.
I worry that we, as parents, focus on minutiae and miss the point.
I typed the above yesterday, and then took it back down...since context is good.....I thought I should provide a little for my rant.
(I don't want anyone thinking I'm specifically pointing fingers.)
The other day I had referred to something as having a stupid design. And 'stupid' rang in my ears. Just like 'shut up' always does. And 'crap.' Words that you were taught not to say in elementary. You know....'cause they're bad words.
But, are they?
I love 'crap.' I know it conjures up all kinds of yucky feelings, which is what makes it the perfect word to describe things.
What I was thinking about yesterday, was how we focus our attention on the words, and not the heart. I can call someone a mean name using nice words.
For example? My sister used to tell me that I had Grandma Hands. (I forgive you, Jen.) (ahahaaha!!) Now, she wasn't saying that my hands were loving and good at baking. She was saying that my hands were old ladyish and dorky. (Not that grandma's are old ladyish and dorky.) Should my parents have banned the word Grandma? Of course not. They should have made my sister pay me $300.
I would have settled for $200.
Anyway...you know what I mean. Less focus on the words, and more focus on the heart.