Today was going to be the day. Maybe. I was scheduled for an induction, and then got a call. The L & D is filling up, and I'm going to have to wait.
My first thoughts were those of ugliness towards all the other ladies hogging up all the spots. Or just the one taking up what was going to be mine. Selfish whale. (Pretty ugly, I know. And hateful. And horrible. I am trying to feel bad about feeling so mad.)
My reaction has been pretty humbling. What's my problem? These women are having babies! Bringing wonderful new beings into this world. I should be glad for them. Not jealous. So what if I have to wait until Christmas for my own baby to find his way out?
The world does not revolve around me. The L & D isn't mine. I can't control everything, even if I try. Why do I keep trying? It only makes life more stressful.
I'm trying to use this as a learning experience. An experience that will help me to place my trust in The One who does have control. The One who knows how this will all play out. The One who loves me and knows what's best and sees the whole big picture.
(Would it be wrong to pray that over half of the mommies there would be sent home because their labor turned out to be false?)
4 comments:
I'm sorry about the wait!! It can be sooo frusterating...at least you have cookies to devour to calm your stress! :-)
I keep checking hoping for "The POST" introducing your newest little one to us all!
Praying still for a safe and healthy delivery!
selfish whales...HAHAHAHA!!!
HAHAHAHA. That one was great.
That is so sweet of your friends to bring 'while you wait cookies'. Hope your wait won't be long..
I made Karla call last night because I didn't want to "bug" you again. One more day! The Lord has a plan and it wasn't yesterday.. the day and time David finally comes is the day and time that will most glorify the Lord. The song "tis so sweet" popped into my head. "Jesus Jesus how I trust Him, How I've proved Him o'er and o'er Jesus, Jesus precious Jesus, o for grace to trust Him more" I'm so excited for you guys. The Lord is continually putting you on my heart and it is my joy to keep lifting you up. In the meantime... maybe more cookies are in order. ;)
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