PSA #2

When your daughter comes home from school yesterday with a lollipop, and keeps on saying, "L...llll...lollipop," over and over and over again, cover your son's ears. Because, he will get a hankering for a lollipop. And for the love of all things beautiful, do not assume after looking up lollipops on Martha's site that you can make them yourself at home. And believe your son when he says that homemade lollipops are yucky for his tummy. And when they said to use vegetable oil to coat the pan, they really meant vegetable oil. They did not say olive oil. Olive oil tastes gross with corn syrup. Really gross.

When you see how perfectly round the shapes of Martha's lollipops are in her lovely photographs, it's because her pans are flat. Completely. They don't buckle when something hot touches them. When your pans buckle, your lollipops will be shaped like Idaho. Or Russia, China...something....

And please. If you are going to make lollipops, check to be sure you have proper sticks. When you only can drum up 3 chopsticks, don't assume that you can just make 3 large lollipops. A lollipop is not intended to be larger than the head of the person consuming it.

Do not {DO NOT!} think it would be cute to use chocolate chips to make a face in your lollipops. Chocolate faces look creepy. Very creepy.

And if you think you should run your saggy lollipops under water to snap them into their correct crackly texture, know that your daughter will grab some napkins to dab up the drippy syrup sweating from the crackly lollipop. Thus ruining, the huge, creepy, gross lollipop.

Please drive through.