Tuesday, February 12, 2008

PSA #2

When your daughter comes home from school yesterday with a lollipop, and keeps on saying, "L...llll...lollipop," over and over and over again, cover your son's ears. Because, he will get a hankering for a lollipop. And for the love of all things beautiful, do not assume after looking up lollipops on Martha's site that you can make them yourself at home. And believe your son when he says that homemade lollipops are yucky for his tummy. And when they said to use vegetable oil to coat the pan, they really meant vegetable oil. They did not say olive oil. Olive oil tastes gross with corn syrup. Really gross.

When you see how perfectly round the shapes of Martha's lollipops are in her lovely photographs, it's because her pans are flat. Completely. They don't buckle when something hot touches them. When your pans buckle, your lollipops will be shaped like Idaho. Or Russia, China...something....

And please. If you are going to make lollipops, check to be sure you have proper sticks. When you only can drum up 3 chopsticks, don't assume that you can just make 3 large lollipops. A lollipop is not intended to be larger than the head of the person consuming it.

Do not {DO NOT!} think it would be cute to use chocolate chips to make a face in your lollipops. Chocolate faces look creepy. Very creepy.

And if you think you should run your saggy lollipops under water to snap them into their correct crackly texture, know that your daughter will grab some napkins to dab up the drippy syrup sweating from the crackly lollipop. Thus ruining, the huge, creepy, gross lollipop.

Please drive through.

11 comments:

Sarri said...

Oh my word! I am dying, Katie! DYING!!

Smellyann said...

This is HILARIOUS. I'm sorry.

Nonna said...

This is just too funny! Thanks for the chuckle. 1437

homespun living said...

I'm sorry the lollipops didn't work out, but it sure made a great story :) Thanks for the chuckle...Deb

kara said...

I am laughing so hard....I think I peed!!!

neeter said...

Thanks for sharing. I was giggling while nakking.

Kathi Miller said...

Thank you for the much needed laugh, Katie! Your blog is so fun and inspiring.

Mara of ::the simpler things:: said...

Oh.
My.
Gosh.

This is truly the funniest post I have ever read. I'll be linking to you sometime later this week. This story just has to be shared!

Tammigirl said...

aaaaahhhhhh HA HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHa!

gOOD ONE... rEALLY GOOD ONE.

Amy said...

YES...this is TOO FUNNY!! And so like something that would happen in my home!! AHHAHHHAHHA!!

Sissy said...

I am new to your blog and had to comment on this! Why would you think to make one? I would think to get in my car and go to the store! It would sooo not occur to me to try to make a lollipop...and your adventure with corn syrup and olive oil tells me that I never should. Good luck with your next project!